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2025-02-15 04:24:41
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Lola
lola@hubzilla.monster
You know you are a feminine guy when lesbians are sexually attracted to you.
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2025-02-15 14:33:51
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Et
et@hub.hoteldaan.nl
What if guys are attracted to you? That must happen, even if you don't know it.
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2025-02-15 17:42:43
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Lola
lola@hubzilla.monster
Yes, I had a gay friend who wanted to sleep with me and even propositioned me. And I know he was not the only one interested.
Many gays and lesbians fall into two archetypes: top and bottom, or butch and lipstick lesbian. The ones with masculine energy would be attracted to my feminine energy. This even applies to straight people. A masculine female would be attracted to a feminine male.
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2025-02-15 19:31:02
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Et
et@hub.hoteldaan.nl
Hmm.. that would truly be a very good base for some research.
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Lola
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2025-02-16 04:43:54
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Lola
lola@hubzilla.monster
NSFW, Sex, Relationships, Personal
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One of my prouder moments was when I slept with a lesbian who said she didn't like guys and turned her bi.
We were close friends, and I was the first person she told that she was a lesbian. So there was a lot of trust there.
One day she was horny, and I was the only one around. We were both single. She was the more masculine type, and I was more submissive. She was hesitant, but the more submissive I was, the more she wanted to have sex with me. I basically just let her seduce me and we wound up having sex.
And that wasn't the only lesbian I slept with. Masculine and feminine energy have a lot to do with who you are attracted to, as I eventually learned.
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2025-02-16 13:03:54
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Et
et@hub.hoteldaan.nl
I think you're right. I'm attracted to feminine energy. But also to masculine energy. I certainly can appreciate a 'strong' woman. So that would make me bi-energized? No experience with men, besides the usual experiments long ago. But not engaging in some frolics doesn't mean you wouldn't enjoy them.
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2025-02-16 14:32:34
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Lola
lola@hubzilla.monster
Everyone is capable of feminine and masculine energy. Most people have a preference and a default state, but everyone has the ability to tap into the opposite energy if they wanted or needed to. Sometimes that has to be learned, but both sets of energy are available to us if we wanted to use it.
A perfect example is the "mama bear" protecting her children. There are many examples of how a very feminine women suddenly becomes masculine if her children are attacked. There are even examples where the mother gains extraordinary strength needed to save their children thanks to a spike in testosterone during the crisis. Then when it is over, they go back to being feminine.
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2025-02-16 14:39:33
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Lola
lola@hubzilla.monster
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There are a lot of moving parts to human sexuality. And if your lover is also your friend, what may be attractive about them as a friend might be different than what is attractive about them in bed.
You sometimes see this when people switch roles in the bedroom. They are powerful and domineering in real life, but then their lover is a dominatrix and they play the submissive role during sex. Or you might have a couple that likes to switch roles, taking turns being dominant or submissive. That is an extreme example, but it does highlight how someone's daily life and sex life can be very different.
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2025-02-16 15:05:23
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Lola
lola@hubzilla.monster
NSFW, Sex, Relationships, Personal
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There is also this myth that feminine is weak. It is not weak. There are weak people who are feminine, but being feminine does not mean you are weak. A feminine women who is strong will often use feminine ways to get what she wants.
A perfect example is when I slept with the lesbian I mentioned. I wanted sex as much as she did, but I recognized that being submissive and doing certain things turned her on. If I acted masculine in any way, she was turned off. So I just played the role of her ideal sex partner, submissive and feminine, and it turned her on so much that it didn't even matter that I wasn't a lesbian. I drew her to me, but she felt like she initiated everything.
In this example, I wanted sex as much as she did. I was completely feminine in that moment, and we both got what we wanted and enjoyed it.
It is possible to assert your will while being feminine.
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2025-02-16 15:11:50
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Lola
lola@hubzilla.monster
This has got me thinking. I think the biggest difference between feminine and masculine is not strength, but method.
Masculine energy is more likely to be assertive and even use force when necessary to get things done. This can be used in a good way or a bad way. Force can be used against people, for example. But it also can be used to protect people and take care of people.
Feminine energy, on the other hand, is more about attracting what you want and influencing people to do something. And this also can be used in a good way or bad way. Manipulation can also be used against people, as an example. But it also can be used to influence people in a positive way and to encourage them to do things that are good for them.
Neither is inherently better. The world needs both depending on the situation.
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2025-02-16 22:19:15
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Et
et@hub.hoteldaan.nl
@
Lola
I don't think the example is that extreme. But I am biased, having worked in a setting in which sex was as normal as eating a sandwich. I think eavesdropping in every bedroom will give you a different idea of how people enjoy sex, than listening to what those people say in public about their love life. Wouldn't it be great if men tried to live a woman's life for a day and vice versa? Well, maybe a week, to make it stick. I mean, really let go and do what your loins dictate you. But that will never happen, decorum and religion will prohibit such endeavors. Nice thought experiment though.
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2025-02-17 02:45:28
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Lola
lola@hubzilla.monster
True. It is extreme for normies, but even people in the middle often have sway in their sexuality. They put on one face to the outside world, and a different face in the bedroom. And true freedom is when you can take off the mask and be yourself.
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2025-02-17 16:43:56
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Et
et@hub.hoteldaan.nl
@
Lola
Yes, but that can be perilous..
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2025-02-17 21:54:01
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Lola
lola@hubzilla.monster
@
Et
It is perilous. Revealing yourself to the wrong person can be disastrous. Because of that, I would say that most people don't ever reveal their true self to others. They go through life behind a mask.
I am someone who people generally feel comfortable talking to. I have had several people come out of the closet with me, with me being the first person they ever told. I have had people admit what they really wanted sexually. I've met feminists that want a career and I've met women who want to stay home and make babies. I've meet dominant people and submissive people. People really are diverse when they take off their mask.
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2025-02-18 20:46:25
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Et
et@hub.hoteldaan.nl
@
Lola
You're non condemning, if people feel that it's easier to open up.
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Lola
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2025-02-19 00:53:19
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Lola
lola@hubzilla.monster
@
Et
I do accept people for the way they are. As someone who wears a mask myself, it is easier for me to see those also wearing a mask. And it is most of us.
No matter how taboo society makes it, we are two things: we are sexual creatures and we are economic creatures. And, economics has a lot more influence on sexuality than most people think. Lust and the desire for a better life are powerful motivators, and sometimes there is a conflict between them. And what turns one person on turns another person off.
It is also about separating the person from the actions they take. I may object to or condemn specific actions, but I don't condemn the person. I try to guide them to make the best decision. It's like the movie Gran Torino. Everyone has a dark side and a light side. Labelling someone good or bad is a gross oversimplification.
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Et
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